i hope you get your dream

lets stay up and talk all night
chain smoking your cigarettes
i know you'd like that
because i see beyond what you notice
your gaze is caught on me
and
you can't look away
but thats okay
im staring back anyways

this summer lets make it matter
alls fair in love an war?
if so many say it, i guess we can believe it
tell me your favorite song
and we'll sing to mine

your voice sounds terrible
as i'm sleeping under mrs. heynes pine tree
and your as wrapped up in the branches
as you are
in me

how will I do

I can't wait to get going but I don't think I'm ready to leave. I'm making plans for the future that may never happen, because who know's what I'll be in the future. What if I waste four, five or even six years trying to figure out something I'll never know...but then again what if I already have? I guess we all get mixed up in this crazy life, so I have no one to turn to. Seems like I'm walking in the wrong direction, I can barely recognize myself sometimes. Am I playing on the safeside, or is this just taking a long time? I don't want to live in fear, I don't want to be afraid to just fall down, no matter how many times it happens, hopefully someone will be there to pick me up. I'm not sure who it will be though, do I know them now? Where will I meet them, or will I make yet another mistake and miss meeting them? I will wait up for you, whoever you are. I secretly hope your waiting for me too.

one moment can change your life forever

An international soccer star is on his way to sign a multimillion dollar contract when a series of events unfold that brings his career to an abrupt end. A beautiful waitress, struggling to make it in New York City, discovers something about herself that she's unprepared for. In one irreversible moment, their lives are turned upside down...until a simple gesture of kindness brings them both together, turning an ordinary day into an unforgettable experience.

there was always love in daddy's hands

dear daddy,
Here you are, another year older, yet again. Fifty-one, wow, honestly it makes me sad to think that someday i will be that age, and you will be even older. I never want that to happen, i want us to stay this way forever. I am so proud of you, everything you have done, for me and for our family. Don't give up on your dreams yet. I know you probably think its too late for alot of things, but its not. You still have so much to do in this life. Lets make a promise for and to each other: you will help me with my dreams if i help you with yours, sound good?
I love you. I love how i am so much like you, but i love how i am so different from you too. I love how we speak the same language. I love how you are quiet, even when you know you shouldn't be. I love how you leave open all the cabinet doors, how you brush your teeth before ever leaving the house, how you eat alot at dinner and how you fall asleep in the passenger seat when I drive.
I don't want to think that i will ever forget these memories that i have with you. I hope we continue to add many more to them though. Thank you for being the best daddy in the world.
Love your little girl,
mary

naming Rain

i fly around in circles
searching for what is unknown
should i give up
maybe sometimes
but don't you think its too late
to start over
lets just pick up
where we first met

sweet images
arise in your eyes
and they tell me
not to worry

you help me understand
this world isn't only mine

all we need is a softer world

" When I was 5 years old, my mom always told me that happiness was the key to life.
When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote happy. They told me I didn't understand the assignment and I told them they didn't understand life. "

its the little things that matter

i feel like summer has started today
i just got back from new jersey and last night i felt so unorganized and i felt like i didnt have control of anything going on in my life. so i wrote my self a list of everything i need to get done this week. Its about a page long, and i have only done about two things so far but for some reason i am excited about it. Its a long list, and there are only seven days in a week....six since im hoping to get everything done by sunday but i some things are small and will only take a second to do. Its just that they are on my list so hopefully i will actually do them, instead of just leaving it as a thought. Today i cleaned and vaccumed my bedroom [two seperate things on the list]..thats one of the bigger things believe it or not haha...it took be like two an a half hours but its done. One of the simpler things on my list is starting my book, well i should say "re-starting" my book. I started it like two months ago, and all it takes to restart it is a page...but for some reason i haven't, in the last week that its been on my mind, started it.
I sat through a "speech" last week, which led me to the awkward conclusion that i love speeches..haha. but the woman was up in front of me with her pretty blonde hair swayed across her face, petite body moving as she got into everything she was saying and just grabbed my attention. She talked about how all we need to do is little things. It was kinda on the subject of 'living in the moment' type of cliche saying but she broke it down and made more sense of it. if i start my book right now, even if i only read two or three pages....i will still have started it. In my mind i think that i want to wait until i have a good half hour to sit down and read, that never gets done and a month goes by before i even think about opening the book. when rather, the minute i first thought of reading the book i could have sat down and read a little, because then if i had kept that low stardard of reading however much i can each day my book would have been done last month.
she talked about a lot of other stuff too and it was so inspiring, but everything she said was true, if i just live, and do little things everyday, if i break down big goals to simple everyday goals they will complete that larger goal in the long run.
toodles-im going to read